Mom Life

Reasons the elf didn’t come back at all

Our family had an elf on the shelf but it didn’t come back this year. Maybe you tried it one year too and realized it wasn’t for you. Maybe you feel like because everyone is doing it and loves it, you have to too. My kids loved the elf. Unfortunately, I didn’t.  Our elf on the shelf never came back and yours doesn’t have to either. I’m not talking about why it didn’t move, I’m talking about making it disappear completely.

You’re kids don’t really need a explanation. If you decided to forgo this crazy elf tradition and they ask “where’s elfie, jingle, snowflake, cookie, chip?” or whatever the heck name you gave a toy elf, simply say ” I don’t know.” and leave it at that. Or you could use these reasons for why he didn’t come.

The elf is tired.

By elf, I mean me. The elf has no energy to run back and forth to the North Pole every freaking night. It’s exhausting to show up in a different spot every time you return. So kids, the elf is tired and is planning on watching from the North Pole with his super Santa spy binoculars.

We can hardly manage the tooth fairy over here, yet alone a toy elf. Remember how I thought the Tooth fairy should run away with the elf.

You’re so good you don’t need the elf anymore.

You guys have been so good all year that Santa decided the elf needed to go to a different family this year.

Isn’t the fact that Santa Cluas is watching you enough?

I guess not.  This is 2017, people always need more.

What about Jesus and god.

So, Santa is watching wasn’t enough? What about Jesus and god? They are always watching.  For Pete’s sake could you just be good. You don’t want to go to hell, do you? DO YOU?

Ever heard of belt on the shelf?

How about wooden spoon on the shelf? You better hope those don’t move. Just kidding. My kid’s do not get beat with anything.  This is 2017.

In all seriousness, you don’t owe your kids an explanation or an elf. The elf on the shelf didn’t come back. That’s it. Get over it. Their Christmas will be just fine.

My mind is blown by how overboard some people get. I mean, look at all these elf accessories and games. Dang, whoever markets this does a darn good job because seriously, every  elf needs an Elf on the Shelf Raincoat.

12 thoughts on “Reasons the elf didn’t come back at all”

  1. Thanks for this! My son is 2 and we were debating about getting an elf next year. I’m still on the fence about it though. It does seem like it could easily get to be a lot of work!

  2. The elf always kind of creeped me out a little bit. I don’t rmemeber this being around when I was younger, but as an adult, I found it kind of creepy! I love creative people get with it though. It’s a really fun concept.

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